Bereavement

Bereavement is a distressing experience, and the death of someone you love following meningitis or meningococcal septicaemia is traumatic and painful.

For many, the suddenness of the disease, and the speed with which it develops, is both shocking and overwhelming. Families can be left feeling stunned and traumatised, sometimes within a matter of hours.

Most people know very little about meningitis and septicaemia until they are affected by it. Many unanswered questions about the disease, and emotional reactions to grief, are likely to cause confusion for people. We are here to help.

We have bereavement support and counselling, and provide practical help, such as giving financial grants towards funeral costs and headstones. Please contact us for more information

Grieving

There is no right or wrong way to feel following the death of someone close to you and it is natural to have very mixed emotions.

You may experience grief through physical symptoms, such as headaches, a hollow feeling in your stomach, breathlessness or a dry mouth.
Experiencing loss can cause your mind to react in unexpected or disturbing ways, such as disbelief, confusion, and sensing the presence of the person who has died. These are natural to someone who is grieving, and are temporary reactions to loss, which will disappear in time.
Grief can influence your behaviour, for example, disturbed sleep, crying, changes in appetite and withdrawing from society.
You may find that the bereavement changes your relationship with others around you.
Crying is natural and beneficial. It is a way of releasing emotion. Above all, grief takes time – it cannot be hurried or avoided.
You may experience lots of different emotions whilst grieving; guilt, anger, numbness, resentment, the need to blame, utter despair and physical pain, total disbelief, shock, intense sadness, loneliness and isolation. These are all part of the grieving process.
Children experience grief too and as an adult you will need to listen to their thoughts and feelings. If you do not tell them what has happened, they may become confused and anxious. Talking to them in words they understand is important.

Grieving - what you can do

It is important to acknowledge that grief is a natural response to loss. It is also vital that you do not try to hide or deny your feelings. Being aware of these feelings and the way you are responding will help you through the process of grieving.

Getting support from friends and family, and talking about your loss with them, can be very beneficial. This can be difficult and at times painful, but it is important to talk about the person you have lost and share memories of them with other people close to you.

Family and friends may also be grieving and finding it difficult to help. Sometimes, talking to someone unrelated and removed from the situation can be helpful. This may be face to face, over the phone, or online. It may also help to talk to someone who has shared a similar experience.

We can help you if you want to talk

We have a network of counsellors and art therapists (for children and young adults) across the UK and a large one-to-one network, where you can talk to, or email, other people who have gone through a similar experience. Our freephone helpline (0808 80 10 388) is available all day, every day, so you can talk to one of our specially trained nurses whenever you want to.

Some people find it beneficial to share their experience of the disease in a bid to raise awareness of the disease amongst others. We have a team at the Trust dedicated to raising vital awareness of meningitis, its symptoms, after-effects and impact within the media (TV, radio, newspapers, magazines and websites), in our literature, on our website and in professional journals. If you would like to share your experience, please get in touch with our Communications Team on 01453 768000 or email Emily. Or, for more information, click through to our story centre here.

Remembering a loved one

We understand that when someone we love dies, it can be helpful to do something positive to honour their memory. At the Trust we have Tribute Funds, where people can remember a loved one by creating a permanent Fund in their name. More and more people are remembering someone special by donating a gift to us, and our Funds enable the gift to be attributed to that person. For more information, visit our page on Tribute Funds.

We are here for you

We specialise in the aftercare and support of people affected by meningitis. Last year we helped 20,000 people through our unique range of free services and community support. We are here for you.

We can:

Offer free, professional support to anyone affected by meningitis; however and whenever it’s needed. Whether you lost someone recently, or ten years ago, we’re here to help you.
Help to ease the burden of meningitis by providing financial support grants towards funeral costs and headstones.
Offer bereavement counselling for the whole family (including art therapy for children and young adults).
Put you in touch with people who have also experienced the loss of a loved one to meningitis.
As the leading voice on the impact of meningitis, we can help with any questions or queries on the disease. Our helpline is available 24-hours a day, 365 days of the year. It’s free and staffed by specially trained nurses, so please get in touch.
Provide free information on meningitis – leaflets (we have a specialist bereavement leaflet), posters, our DVD, or by sending a member of our community team to do a talk or presentation.

Have you been affected by meningitis and need support? If so, we are here to help you. We have a wide range of free, professional support services available to you right now. Simply call one of our nurses (freephone helpline 0808 80 10 388) and they can talk you through everything that we do; from a home visit, to counselling, financial support grants, art therapy and community support. Our support is for life and available to anyone affected by the disease; their family, friends, colleagues, neighbours and the whole community.